The Toneyard

I am in the market for a car. Since I work 6am-2pm, and since the buses do not run until after 6am, I must provide my own transportation this summer. Today we drove to Killington, which is about 30 miles away, to scope out a 1990 Ford Taurus that was advertised on Vehix.com. It had some rust issues on all the wheelwells, but shockingly only had 50,000 miles on it. Not bad for a 19 year old car. What IS bad about this car is that the rear suspension rides about 5 inches low, and there is a horrible rattle on the rear passenger side while driving.

Tricky recommended I pursue other vehicles. I agreed. Tomorrow I'm going to check out a used Subaru Legacy at a dealership here in White River. I hope it's not a total piece of shit. It's fun to have a week of training in car sales, so I know exactly what the salesman are trying to pull.

Yesterday we went through a couple dealerships, all of them owned by MILLER AUTO GROUP, which is notorious for staffing needy douchebags. At the first store, a salesman named Jason actually stepped in front of our car as we cruised through the lot, in order to get us to stop and talk to him. I told him I was looking for something under 3k, and he didn't have anything for me. But he still tried to talk us into looking at other stuff. We declined.

At the second store, we cruised through quickly once I noticed they were all new cars. One salesman started jogging across the lot towards our moving car, and another popped out of the building just as we passed, and merely waved and said "Have a good day". The jogger yelled "Wait, come back!!!" as we sped out of the lot.

After checking out the Taurus piece of shit, we stopped at this huge antique mall near Quechee. We spent at least 2 and a half hours there looking at all the crazy shit. Here's just a taste.

Nah, I already dropped mine off at the pool.

Some kind of crazy time traveling chair.

Demure weirdpig.

There was a case full of mint-in-package original Star Wars figures. I feel sorry for whoever spends 75 dollars on the fat shirtless guy who blubbers when the Rancor dies.

Nothing to say here, really.

AHHHHHHHHHH. This is a CHAIR by the way.

Pimp cane.

WAMPASTOMPA!

Apparently they sell crack pipes at antique stores now.

E.T. is trippin balls.

Jarshark.

Bring me a basket of stuffed ducklings immediately!

I hope you enjoyed this montage of weird shit from the antique store. I would have taken more (because there is much much more to show), but my eyes tend to unfocus and fall out of my head after looking at shelves crammed full of weird stuff for two and a half hours. Until next time....





SWEET DREAMS!